Sunday, March 20, 2011

I THAWt I THAW a puddy tat!

Now Playing -  
Wrap Your Troubles In Dreams
by Frankie Laine

Life -  
  Two days ago, as I sat in my car talking to my wife on my lunch break, I looked down at the handy dandy temperature gauge thingy and was a bit shocked. I knew it was nice out, but that thing claimed it was almost 70 degrees out. SEVENTY! This is almost twice the temperature from the day before. Welcome to spring baby!

The next morning, I slumped out of bed (I've got some sort of nasty crud sickness going on) and put on a pair of shorts. If it was gonna be this nice, I was going to celebrate! As I walked past the window, I noticed a quite lovely 3 inches of snow on everything that had fallen during the night. CURSES!

Now, it's a day later and while it's still quite chilly out, around forty, most of that snow has finally melted too, and our three feet of permafrost ice in the backyard has started to recede into the rear hills. Unfortunately, they're slowly revealing, archaeology dig style, layers of long forgotten dog poo. Lets do the math.... Between the two dogs, they eat nearly twelve cups of dog food a day. That's to say nothing of the assorted chewies, peanut butter treats, surreptitiously stolen foodstuffs and hunks of devoured teddy bears. For the last three and a half months, the snow's been too deep for the boys to go anywhere but a roughly eight foot square of hard packed yard just beyond the porch door.
Which hasn't been a big deal, it's snowed regularly enough to keep things looking fresh and covered and out of the realm of Pooka's favorite treat, the horrible Poopsicle. But now, now the ice has receded and laid before us is three months of two dogs pooping roughly four cups of poop for every one cup they ate, apparently. This is a horror show. Like a massive medieval battle was waged between the clumpys and the squishers and the dead litter the battlefield, a massive white-furred vulture looming overhead.

Something must be done. Perhaps it can wait until it's fully thawed and I can hose it all away in a river of liquefied excrement? Or maybe everything will melt, then we'll get a couple days of cold weather, just enough to harden the crap but not freeze it to the ground...  A bucket and some rubber gloves? A rake and a black bag? Twenty bucks and a very resentful but hard up teen? The solutions are endless and none of them look very realistic.


Writing - 
I've cranked out about three thousand words in the last few days. Which will be great if they aren't all rants about poo!

The ROUS FAMILY -     

Sunday, March 13, 2011

Assembling The Ultimate Power In The Universe Part One

I have wanted the Lego version of the Death Star for a very long time. I love Legos, Star Wars and audaciously sized things, so it's a perfect fit, but the price has always been quite daunting. $400, regardless of the awesomeness it brings, is a lot of galactic credits. So finally, after paying down some bills, I convinced my gorgeous and brilliant wife to let me buy it.

So I recruited some tiny plastic help and waited impatiently for the 20 pound, 2 foot tall box to arrive....
That's no moon....
My crew is dwarfed by the size of that thing!
Within, I found four large boxes, a small sticker sheet and an inch thick, spiral bound instruction manual.
Box one is opened and spread wide.

Opening the first bag...
Step one - The Minifigs. All 25 of them!
The assembled crew.
Mouse Droid!
My helper robot makes a friend.
My builder meets the buildee, Luke Skywalker (1of 3)

Step Two... The building begins.

The ROUS FAMILY -     

Monday, March 7, 2011

I Came, I Thaw, I Conquered

Now Playing -    
Ease Back
by Amos Lee

Life -  
 A combination of snow, sleet, more and more snow, warm and cold weather.. That's been the last few months. Which has resulted in an accumulation of very firmly packed snow topping out at over two feet in a lot of places in our yard. Our driveway, which gets plowed and scraped and sprayed with sand has suffered too. In some places, the ice on the drive was over 6 inches thick. It was not uncommon this winter for Lindsay's car to only make it halfway up the driveway before giving up.My Element handled it pretty handily for the most part, but it's been intense. We've been using what we've called "the goat path" to get down to the drive. I'm pretty sure there's steps somewhere under there, but you'd never know.

But for the last month, we've started getting some warm days. Warm enough that the driveway loses a bit off the top, refreezing at night into a glassy finish. And the other day when I went to leave for work, my car had slid over six feet down the drive as the ice below it melted.

So spring is on it's way, and I cannot wait. I love winter, delight in the snow falling down, in the cold prickles of air up my nose, but enough is enough. I want to walk the dogs, clean out the house, go to the car wash. I even want to pick up four months of dog poop!

For the last three days, it's been raining during the day. I can even see dirt in a few places and the three foot tall pole in the back yard corner has broken through for the first time since December.

Keep it up, Mother Nature!